Helper or Slave??

Big brothers and sisters are the best helper we have but there is limit of help they should do?? I had my two boys very close together, like Latin twins close - 11mths apart, to avoid the helper complex.
I had a great notion that if they were two babies in the house the older one wouldn't have to be forced the help with their young bro or sis. I didn't want to teach the older sibling not to have a baby at a young age by showing them the hard work that a baby entails.
I have seven brothers and sister (yea big family) and I helped out with my younger siblings but not enough to feel bothered by it. My younger brother helps with our younger twin sisters and he is very bothered by it. He told me once he doesn't wanna do anymore favors for his baby sisters. His mother would always say can you do me a favor please? Ever since this comment, I swore my kids would never feel this way. Yea one of those promise every non-mother makes before she becomes a mom.
-F.Y.I half those promises have been long forgotten and broken.. It happens no reason to cry over it.. You cant make real promises about something you know nothing about. Motherhood is a job you learn about once you have the job. Hands on training is the only real way to learn
So this was one of the reasons for my Latin twins but guess what my older son does help me out. He loves to help out to because I am grateful for his help and I try not to over do it. An example of how he help is the morning pamper change. Now my boys get up at 6am (yes feel my pain - lol), I would like to sleep longer but it doesn't happen. My little ones favorite time to poop is in the morning soo 90% of the time he is pooped before we get out of bed. Before I got hip to this am poop I open the pamper to find a huge mess and my son was wiggling everywhere. In the efforts not to get poop EVERYWHERE I ask my older son to get me the wipes.. I said Pamper change emergency..lol He ran and go the wipes, aquaphor and the new pamper. This was GREAT and big help.
Soo now this is how he helps me out. He likes to do it, yea sounds like I am making it up but one morning my fiancee was home and he got me the wipes and pamper and my older son freaked out.. He was sooo mad his father helped me. He felt like his job was stolen, crazy and a little funny. I tried to calm down by saying we had teamwork today but since he is at the independence stage this didn't work. His father doesn't mind letting him help out with this at all. It is his job for as long as he wants it.
I think this type of help is fine but I don't ever want to get to the point where he is the only taking care of his baby bro like changing his pamper all by himself, feeding him, dressing him. That won't be fair, at least I don't think so.
So we all need help but just keep in mind of who's help you are getting a lot of :o) Helping is a chance to teach listening skills and following directions skills but just remember to not over do it because your little one will let you know..